Jokes from the bar.......

Yeah yeah...I'm a heathen. I actually break with tradition and mingle with the masses. Well actually it's more people watching than mingling.......but it can be great fun damnit!! :) Joke 1: 2 buddies are sitting at the bar having a few beers friday night. 1st one says...Frank....if I were to leave right now and make sweet love to your wife...and she got pregnant.....would that make us related? Frank take a long pull off his beer and ponders.....Well Sam I'm not sure about related, but it would probably make us even. Joke2: It's been determined that by age 40...99% of all women will have intelligent dna in them at some point....unfortunately it has also been determined that 99% of them will spit it back out.:) Joke3 A Texan walks into a pub and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, 'Is your date running late?' No', he replies,'I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just testing it..' The intrigued woman says, 'a state-of-the-art watch? ''What's so special about it?' The Texan explains, 'It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically.' The lady says, 'What's it telling you now?' Well, it says you're not wearing any panties.' The woman giggles and replies Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!' The Texan smiles, taps his watch and says, The damned thing's an hour fast!' Enjoy the weekend goofs and friends.......you all play safe...;)